Have not been blogging for a while. There isn't much change and updates. I cannot exactly say that I am in rough patch, because I think it is in a way self imposed on myself.

Less than a month to the milestone - 5 years on my first job, through I have been shifting around. I am still unsure if it would be the right one for me. I am still procrastinating about if I should leave after my bond or should I stay for good. I seriously thought about staying, but then I can feel the passion and interest is slowly leaving me. I know that I am not performing to the best of my ability nowadays. Which I think that there are many reasons to it, it is quite ironic but I got to say that one of it must be that I don't think that I know my present job scope well. There are many procedures in logistics and my knowledge is quite limited. And the work load is so heavy and furious that it is a struggle to find time to look for someone to teach, and it is not easy to find someone either, just like any outside job, there is a lot of competition in there and not many would be nice to share the knowledge.

Well there's why I was so reluctant to make the change back last year. I was so experienced in the manpower administration and was in a comfort zone. I was contributing much more that I am doing so now. Now? I may have put in long hours as well, but I am seriously and clearly struggling. My output is low. I am working on the same project for like weeks, and yet I am not done with it.

So? I think unless something dramatic happened in the next year, I can already sense the exit. The time is not right yet. But man I do not know if I can last so long at the rate that I am losing it.

But I do not have the answer on what I want to do outside as well. So well I think this status quo will remains for a while.

The flu that is not going away. The Alec that seems to be stop running. The Alec that seems to be putting on weight. One word sums it all up : UNHAPPY.

With this, I ended this post. I am taking a break from blogging until I can find my motivation and direction back, with the exception of special events and running events that I feel worthy to write about.