Am i really okay?

Ruth asks me if i am really okay when i told her i am fine...

Yes the feeling of losing her is really complicated...

It's sad to let go... Who doesn't when it is your mother who passed on...

But thinking of her suffering in the past 6 years when she was bedridden, I am relieved that she no longer need to suffer anymore...

And the past 8 years or so, i have been independent already... And the past 3 years or so, i have been staying alone...

And it's also a relief for me... I have been supporting my mother all this time... So it's one less burden on me...

So overall, ya it's very complicated... Sad but relieved...

But life goes on... I cant keep dwelling on her death, i am sure she didn't want me to... So i am moving on...

It's just the end of a chapter of the never-ending lessons in life...